Flight Attendants Are Sharing the Passenger Behaviors Wearing Them Down – “It’s Every Flight, Every Trip”

I have run my own business for 21+ years, and even I have aspects I am not fond of. But a flight attendant’s post reveals something far worse than a few bad behaviors happening now and then. What is even more interesting is that what she said instantly prompted other flight attendants to share their experiences (and some are… well… unsettling, to say the least!).

And I think we’ve all seen disruptive and bad behavior on flights. I even wrote about many odd (again, to say the least) behaviors – like a passenger climbing into an overhead bin, a Delta passenger refusing to end a phone call until the situation affected everyone on the plane, and passengers clipping or filing their nails at their seats.

As I was saying, six words from a person identifying themselves as a flight attendant were enough to start a much bigger conversation:

“The job is amazing. I hate the passengers.”

The complaint wasn’t about one horrible flight or one passenger who had pushed things too far. It came from someone who said they still liked the job, the benefits, the layovers, and the paycheck, but had become exhausted by what they described as repeated confrontations with travelers.

Then other flight attendants started replying.

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The Flight Attendant Said She Had Reached the Point of Giving Up on Some Battles

The person behind the discussion identified herself as working for the airline she called “America’s #1 Airline,” and coverage published by View From The Wing identified the carrier as Delta Air Lines. Because the account is anonymous, her identity and employment can’t be independently verified.

She said she had worked for another airline before and that she still genuinely liked many parts of being a flight attendant. What had changed was how willing she was to get involved in passenger problems.

“Compliance checks don’t exist anymore. FAA regulations are just sentences in a book. We can’t enforce them, passengers don’t listen. …I no longer do anything more than serve cookies and Diet Coke.”

She described becoming less willing to intervene over every rule violation or go out of her way to resolve passenger problems, and claimed complaints could sometimes leave the crew member feeling as though trying to enforce something simply wasn’t worth the fight.

Again, those are her claims and shouldn’t be read as an official description of Delta policy.

But flight attendants at other airlines began recognizing parts of what she described.

One Passenger Allegedly Filled an Entire Overhead Bin

One flight attendant from another airline described, in the same Reddit thread, a passenger boarding with three bags.

According to the crew member, the passenger put all three bags and his jacket into one overhead compartment, effectively occupying the whole bin.

The flight attendant asked him to temporarily put two bags under the seat because the flight was going to be full.

According to the commenter, the passenger became angry, swore at the crew member and complained:

“About 2 weeks ago I had a guy on my flight come on with 3 bags. He put all three in the bin and his jacket, took up the entire bin. I said hey, for now let’s just do one bag up two bags under the seat, we do a full flight we will need the space. I was greeted with a nice fuck you it’s not a full flight (oversold by 10 actually but what do i know) I never have this problem on delta fuck you guys I’m never flying with you again. I just gasped and said oh my god, delta is amazing I don’t blame you. Good riddance.”

Someone actually replied to this:

“He said fuck you? Your airline does not let you eject assholes that curse at you? Did he explain how he claimed to know that the flight was not full? I’d love to hear where his expertise comes from.” 

Overhead-bin disputes have become familiar enough that I recently covered another passenger repeatedly ignoring requests on a full flight until a flight attendant eventually had to deal with the situation herself.

Another flight attendant in this discussion described making announcement after announcement asking people not to put backpacks and jackets in the bins when the aircraft was full.

“Someone will look you dead in the eye and still do it.”

Eventually, the crew member said, they stopped expecting repeated announcements to work and simply began rearranging the bins themselves.

“It’s hard to enforce things when no one cares so you end up looking like a bitch when you’re literally just trying to do your, OUR, job.”

Then Came the Pets, Alcohol and TikTok Without Headphones

A person identifying themselves as Canadian cabin crew joined the discussion with a longer list.

“We allow pets in the cabin and the owners let the dogs out constantly, then lose their minds when you remind them of the rules.”

And that wasn’t all.

“They drink their own booze on board, listen to TikTok without headphones at full volume, etc. etc.”

They also complained about travelers going through the curtain to use the business-class lavatory and said they had little interest in spending the day arguing with hundreds of people.

The loud-phone complaint is especially familiar. Passengers scrolling TikTok or watching videos without headphones have generated enough frustration that some airlines have started taking a much harder line. I looked at airline rules about using headphones on planes after another discussion in which travelers complained about adults playing videos at full volume.

Other crew members in the current thread mentioned passengers congregating in work areas, loose service animals and people photographing flight attendants after being challenged over rules. 

Some Flight Attendants Say They No Longer Fight Every Battle

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Flight attendants repeatedly ask passengers not to do plenty of things, but one commenter in this discussion made an important distinction between minor issues and rules they still consider essential.

“A passenger isn’t going to die from landing with a plastic cup.”

Tray tables, seatbacks and bags were a different matter.

“Tray tables, seatbacks, bags, device holders etc I do politely enforce because they impede evacuations.”

Passenger fights were another situation they weren’t prepared to ignore.

The flight attendant said they intervene before arguments escalate, separating people if necessary:

“like the elementary school children they are.”

Another crew member shared a phrase they said was used at their airline:

“We’re informers not enforcers.”

For them, it helped establish a boundary: explain what the passenger is supposed to do, document the issue when necessary and avoid turning every refusal into a personal battle.

The original poster later revealed that her own frustration was already changing how much she worked.

“I’m dialing back my flying and dropping as many trips as possible.”

She still wanted to fly, but said the “never-ending streaks of abuse” were testing her patience.

Several Flight Attendants Thought This Sounded Like Burnout

Not everyone reading the original post took it as simply a story about terrible passengers.

One commenter responded:

“Sounds like you’re burnt out.”

That flight attendant said burnout could come in waves and described struggling before finding ways to handle passenger interactions differently.

Someone else was equally direct:

“You’re getting burnt out, which is common in this job.”

Another person didn’t need to speculate about anyone else’s experience:

“I’m burnt out and exhausted for all the reasons you just described.”

And, interestingly, another flight attendant had started an entirely separate discussion about burnout at almost exactly the same time.

Another Flight Attendant Said: “It’s Every Flight, Every Trip”

On September 20, a separate flight attendant posted a discussion titled “Burnt Out”.

They said that when they first started flying, they thought they’d found their “forever job.”

A few years later, the experience sounded different.

“I’ve become so frustrated with crazy, angry, rude, entitled passengers.”

Then came an even stronger line:

“It’s every flight, every trip.”

But this person wasn’t blaming passengers for everything.

They talked about delays and cancellations, changing schedules, long workdays, lack of sleep and the difficulty of maintaining any type of normal routine.

The conclusion was simple:

“I’m just getting burnt out.”

Other flight attendants recognized the change in themselves too.

One person who said they had been flying for five years wrote:

“This job has made me bitter at times. I used to have so much patience and now I don’t.”

Another said they’d learned to recognize their own warning signs:

“If I do start feeling frustrated or annoyed way too easily, I know it’s because I’m starting to get burnt out and I need to cut back on my hours.”

The flight attendant who started the thread later admitted that sometimes the thoughts running through their head are much less diplomatic than anything they’d actually say to a passenger:

“Sometimes I just want to say ‘I don’t care. Sit down. Shut up. Who do you think you are? Act your age.’”

They weren’t saying they speak to passengers that way. The comment was about how much frustration they’re suppressing while continuing to do a customer-facing job.

This Isn’t the Only Time Flight Attendants Have Talked About Reaching Their Limit

Recent complaints aren’t limited to these two Reddit discussions. In July, flight attendant Leanna Coy described a difficult Las Vegas trip on TikTok as “the day that broke my spirit.”

The flight had actually started well, but things deteriorated quickly. There were six lap infants onboard – the maximum allowed – which meant the crew had to rearrange seating so there would be only one lap infant in each row, because each row has only one additional oxygen mask available in an emergency. Coy said some passengers immediately demanded refunds when asked to move. Later, another passenger became angry when his bag wouldn’t fit in the overhead bin. When Coy tried to offer another solution, she said he started yelling at her, and the situation escalated enough that two gate agents had to step in. She even considered having him removed from the aircraft.

Then a planned 40-minute layover turned into a three-hour delay after maintenance found an issue that needed attention. Coy said passengers accused the crew of putting them on an unsafe aircraft, yelled at her, accused her of lying and criticized the pilot. She eventually got home around 2 a.m. After hours of dealing with the seating problems, the baggage confrontation, maintenance issues and angry passengers, she said she ended up crying in an airport bathroom. Her point wasn’t that passengers shouldn’t be frustrated by delays – the crew was stuck in the same situation – but that directing that frustration at flight attendants made an already difficult day much harder.

Sometimes the behavior flight attendants complain about sounds almost absurdly basic.

In May, flight attendants told The Washington Post that passengers poking, tapping and grabbing crew members to get their attention happened frequently enough that some were wearing patches, lanyards or aprons asking people not to touch them.

Michelle Montez, a flight attendant with 20 years of experience, told the publication:

“It’s almost a rare occurrence when it doesn’t happen.”

And in another Reddit discussion in August, a seven-year flight attendant questioned how heavily the career is romanticized.

“We are also serving drinks, picking up trash, enforcing rules most people ignore, getting blamed for delays we did not cause…”

Yet even that discussion had plenty of disagreement. Other crew members said the flexibility, travel benefits and freedom from a conventional office job still made the career worth it for them.

Not Every Flight Attendant Thinks Passengers Are the Problem

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The original thread had strong pushback too.

One commenter who appeared to identify themselves as working for the same airline had almost the opposite experience.

“The one thing I like about being at America’s number 1 airline is the passengers. Waaaay better than the previous two airlines I’ve been at.”

They described passengers remaining calm through extended delays and even recalled one trip where travelers went through three aircraft changes and different gates within an hour without causing a scene.

The flight attendant did suggest their routes might explain some of the difference. They said they tended to avoid leisure routes and New York.

Another flight attendant with 14 years in the industry said it helped to remember that difficult passengers represented only part of the people onboard.

“I view it at my union airline as 90% good passengers, 5% stupid and the rest a waste of space.”

They admitted they’d stopped caring so much about enforcing every rule “to the max,” but focusing on the good passengers had helped them over the years.

A frequent flyer joined the conversation from the other side of the aisle and said they regularly send compliments to airlines when a flight attendant does a great job.

“People like to bitch, but they don’t always like to praise.”

The original poster called passengers like that “a ray of sunshine.”

One Flight Attendant Said Passengers Are Actually the Easiest Part

Another crew member disagreed much more strongly with the idea that passengers were the biggest problem.

“The passengers are literally the easiest part of the job.”

They argued that truly awful passengers didn’t appear often enough to define the job and disappeared from the crew member’s life as soon as the flight ended.

For this flight attendant, the real problem was everything surrounding the passengers:

“The only thing I find truly difficult about this job is the lifestyle of being away all the time, the lack of routine, delays, reschedules, constantly changing wake and sleep times etc.”

That changes the burnout discussion.

A flight attendant may encounter a rude passenger while already exhausted from a schedule change, a delay, disrupted sleep or another day spent away from home. Another flight attendant may deal with exactly the same job conditions and still say the passengers are one of the parts they enjoy.

The people actually doing the job don’t agree on what is wearing them down.

Some Passenger Behaviors Keep Appearing Again and Again

One thing the discussions do show is that certain complaints surface constantly.

Overhead-bin arguments. Loud videos. People touching flight attendants. Passengers ignoring announcements. Arguments over seats. People standing when they’re supposed to remain seated.

Even after landing, travelers jumping into the aisle and grabbing bags before anyone can actually leave have become so notorious that the behavior has its own nickname: “aisle lice.”

None of these behaviors proves that flying has suddenly become unbearable or that most passengers are difficult.

But when the same small conflicts happen repeatedly, on several flights a day and several days a week, it’s easier to understand why a flight attendant might experience them differently from a traveler who encounters one annoying passenger during a vacation.

Then Someone Warned the Original Poster

By September 21, the first discussion wasn’t staying inside the flight-attendant community anymore.

A person identifying themselves as another Delta flight attendant left a warning beneath the post:

“Fellow 🔺 FA here. This thread got picked up by a popular travel blog, I see it floating around on Facebook now. Might want to delete it to be safe.”

And then the original post disappeared.

Reddit now says the original poster deleted it.

View From The Wing had already published its coverage, which is why portions of the original post can still be read.

The Reddit replies remain visible too.

So the original six-word confession may be gone, but the conversation it triggered isn’t.

Flight attendants are still arguing among themselves about the same questions: how much passenger behavior has changed, which battles are worth fighting, where enforcing rules ends and self-preservation begins, and how much of the anger we’re seeing is really a sign of something bigger.

And perhaps that disagreement is the most interesting part of all.

Violeta Loredana

Violeta-Loredana Pascal is a communications expert, business mentor, and the founder of Earth’s Attractions and PRwave INTERNATIONAL. A pioneer in the Romanian digital PR landscape since 2005, she holds a degree in Communication and Social Sciences from SNSPA Bucharest. Violeta is a senior trainer at AcademiadeAfaceri.ro, where she leverages over 20 years of experience to teach professional courses in PR strategy and workplace productivity. By blending high-level business consulting with a passion for holistic travel and wellness, she empowers solopreneurs to overcome procrastination, build profitable brands, and design a life of purposeful adventure.